Caliman - V7

Caliman - V7 from Hotel Sierra on Vimeo.

I did this once before about a year ago and couldn't repeat it. Today, I did it twice. I'm not sure it's V7 anymore. I couldn't do V5 in the gunks, so I'm downgrading this in my personal book to V4 max.

Absurd.

This short video sums up our foray into frozenness. If you go now, this is what you can expect. It's all yours with no crowds. If you happen to see me there, just shoot me and put me out of my misery.

Thick. from Hotel Sierra on Vimeo.

Gunks carriage road. 18F.

Yeah, so M and I were the only ones psychotic enough to boulder outside yesterday. The usually friendly approach from the unusually empty Trapps parking lot was converted into a treacherous ice slide. We slipped and fell a couple times but were protected by eskimo-like layers of clothing and crash pads. At least we didn't have to pay the usual $15 fee since the ranger was not loony enough to leave the comfort of his living room. Of course, for the amount of misery we endured, we should have been paid. Just kidding - being married and working for a paycheck have already killed me so I don't feel a thing. Ok, just kidding again - marriage is a wonderful institution and scratching for your meat is, by most people's definitions, a good thing.

We started with the Lorax V4. I don't know if the hand-jam is off on this contrived piece of scheisse. Knowing the gunks, it probably is. I then tried New Pair of Glasses V7. Hands and toes froze after the first move. I didn't realize that numb toes could actually be worse than numb hands. Masa then did the Gill Pinch roof V4 and I tried White boys and Puerto Ricans V7. Suffice to say, my meager breakfast of a slice of pumpkin pie and an espresso from the Muddy Cup in town was not fueling the success I fantasized about.

We then shifted our focus to the Black Boulder V3. Our frozen asses and diminishing core strength did not help us on what is considered a "classic" on the east coast. Also, the Sportiva Cobras aren't the best heel-hooking hardware, as Matt S confirmed afterwards.

After 6 hours in sub-zero temperatures on overrated boulders, we retired to Bacchus for their overrated beer selection and non-existent service. Matt was right: "Never go there when you're hungry. You will starve to death." (waiting for service).

The highlight of the day, besides not being in a chalk filled gym with nauseating music (except for NJR when Matt plugs his mp3 player in), was finding the Crystal Sword, or "Icecalibur"*. I think it was by Key Hole Crack. There was a frozen waterfall with huge icicles, and we discovered one that perfectly resembled a sword, replete with bulbous handle, hilt, and proportional taper. Yeah, that sounds embarrasingly phallic and i sound like a geek/dork** raised on Luke Skywalker. Sadly, both are true.

After being frozen, bruised, and battered, I drove back to NJ and was greeted by a blizzard white-out. Couldn't get the car up the driveway and had to shovel the 2 feet of snowdrift out of the 20 foot incline at midnight. Why do so many people live in this god-forsaken state? Suffice to say, my neck feels like whiplash and my back and trapezius feel like fifty angry ninjas wailed on them with rusty dung-covered garden tools. My soul and body are now unified.

*Heather L gets credit for that one.

**I always forget the difference.

Slopey traverse again.

I sent this for the first time last year but have not been able to repeat it since then. So I decided to film myself, thinking I'd learn about my climbing mistakes. Instead I learned about the unconscious gestures that overwhelm me and I grew instantly embarrassed. Talk about narcissistic!

Slopey Traverse V6. from Hotel Sierra on Vimeo.

Yellow card:

• Stripping
• Talking to self
• No onsight
• Lens flare
• Crashpad visible

Red Card:

• Dressing (sort of)
• Ass-dragger problem
• only V6
• silly hat + bareback
• Filming self

MIA:

• Punk rock music soundtrack
• Screaming

Additional punishment for Red Card offenders may include, but is not limited to, rear naked chokes, donkey punches, and other forms of humiliation not to be tried at home.

Mr. Choad.

On the way to the Sunny & Steep crag, we encountered my first Red Rock tarantula. I placed my sunglasses by it for scale. Below is me redpointing Mr. Choad's Wild Ride, a 10 bolt 5.11b that had stymied me on numerous occasions. A small improvement in foot work and taking interminably long rests (there are a couple no hands stances) enabled me to push to the top, albeit still pretty pumped.

Below, Mark seconds the route and cleans it. A lot easier to have the second clean it than to do it while lowering because the route seems to wander left to right.

Mark's reaction to the pumpitude afterwards.

Back to Black Velvet.

Dream of Wild Turkeys 5.10a.

Here I lead my first 5.9 trad pitch. Good stances, but I started to get tired placing gear. Adding to the stress was that this was 150' long and I was running out of draws and pro. Good fun.

Andrei follows the 5.10a traverse on pitch 3.

Andrei following another 5.10a on pitch 4. It was at this point that I whipped out my daisy chain and inadvertently knocked the left lens out of my glasses. Andrei noticed a transparent piece of plastic plunge past him into the abyss 400 ft down. I ended up with no depth perception. And it was getting dark. Damn. Because of this we had to bail. Of course, the rope got stuck behind a huge flake and Ben had to lead back up to it to free it. Andrei noted that the more difficult the climb the more things started to go wrong.

Icebox Canyon.

Frigid Air Buttress 940' 5.9+.

Here I am on pitch 5, a large awkward chimney. I was able to get a head jam with my helmet.
Past the chimney and the swing onto the left face, I proceed to higher ground. There was a pretty good 4" cam placement at the top of the chimney.

Andrei leading. Actually not sure if this is a pic from this route. For some reason I can remember bouldering and sport routes down to the foot jibs, but on these traditional multipitch climbs, I seem to be unable to recall all the pitches in detail. I also have a poor memory for my placements. Perhaps this just comes with time. Andrei would tell me that a cam placement was not ideal and point out better positions, but I had a hard time visualizing what he was referring to even though I had just led it!

Ben leads the final 5.9+ pitch, which consists of a beautiful finger crack... I think this photo is of him on the diciest moment, checking a partial swing.

Frogland.

Andrei leading a chimney. (Oops... this is actually a pitch on Frigid Air Buttress (see more recent post for details on that. I also forgot to mention at the top of Frogland, we ran into Bill Ramsey and a professor friend of his that was 77 yrs old (!) and climbing 5.8. Truly inspiring. I would also add that Frogland is uber popular, and there were at least 3 parties behind us. So if you go on a weekend either get there super early or avoid it.)
I don't know how the helmet got there.
I think this was 5.7 or 5.8 ... 6 or 7 pitches. My trad mentors Ben and Andrei showed up from NJ and took me on some delightful classics. Pictures above are from Frogland in Black Velvet Canyon.

Single Right.

Short-ish.
Sharp-ish.
Tall-ish. V1-2ish.
Matt-ish.
Dyno-ish.

Conglomeration.

09/25/09 -- Montserrat...
Conglomerate...
Breathtaking. Less than an hour outside the city. Free. No people. No garbage, very little graffiti. Our route was named Fragel Rock. The approach was 45 degree uphill slog (1 hr+?) requiring fixed ropes in some places. 7 pitches of bolted sport. But the route wanders quite drastically, so we used twin ropes.
Last two pitches are 5.10d then 5.11b. Imagine a full body massage given by a grizzly bear in a bad mood. That's what I felt like afterwards.
That was before the descent. The descent is an maybe an hour of steepness that also required fixed ropes, and left my legs feeling like rodney king.
At the top there was helipad.
I could have used a chopper at that moment to fly me back to the car.

Barcelona.

Sorry for the uber-belated post. Work+climb=no time.

09-24-09 arrived in BCN today. Went with Fernando and Otso and Uma to get chorizo bocadillo and cafe. Then to La Fuixarda to climb. It's an interesting locale, and I immediately started to understand why europeans climb stronger than americans.

Looks like a tunnel next to a rugby stadium...

But suddenly, it's a free outdoor climbing gym, replete with huge traverses and overhanging sport climbing!

Outside the tunnel, it's blast rock (still pretty decent) with the 5 meters being cement with drilled pocket holds. Just like Mt. Charleston.

I led/tried to onsight the following:
5.10 - tunnel
5.10 - tunnel
outside tunnel on walls that are half artificial:
5.11ish - one foot slip on humid slab ... otherwise no problem.
5.11d / 12a - almost flashed.
5.11ish - onsight
5.10 - setup tr for some kids that couldn't make it to the anchor.

Lost City again.

I'm ambivalent on the anti-guide stance of the locals. Everybody and their brother knows about the place. I guess I don't really care since I have a local to climb with.

Warmup on the magnum boulder. I got a yellow card for burning a beginner on the slab. Apparently "burning" somebody means walking up to something that people are working on and hiking it. It's poor form and betrays a petty ego stroke. Don't burn people - unless they're your friends, in which case feel free to burn away.

Below Theresa on one of the v1s on the back of the Magnum boulder.

Learned about some new problems, but can't remember all the names.
Hungarian traverse v2
something around the left of the hungarian traverse - v2
boulder next to magnum - v4
boulder next to magnum - v6 - couldn't do it.
Matt's v7/8/9 project which is on an orange arete reminiscent of tigerstyle. couldn't do that. did ok on the beginning.
Cagefighter - v6 - couldn't do opening move, but could do all the other moves to the top out. Matt is able to waltz the start which I couldn't fathom. Fur and gristle outperform springy reach.. usually does.
Then we watched Zach D try Thumb War v10.
I didn't even touch that one... looked very painful. But complaining about the pain and the landings at the gunks is considered poor form by some. It's sharp conglomerate, like sticking your hands inside a pitbull's mouth, and you're landing on sharp talus, and wading through poison ivy, spiders, mosquitoes, fat millipedes, snakes, and possibly ticks. Not to mention other desperate tri-state area boulderers. Aside from that, problems actually have pretty good movement and can be technical, which I enjoy. I was a little shaky today due to lack of food and sleep and an abundance of beer and sake the night before. If you're going climbing, don't do that to yourself. Trust me.

Fried anorexic chicken.

Before setting out for Flagstaff, we got food for the road at Albertson's. The proper way to eat fried chicken from Albertson's Supermarket:
1. Purchase fried chicken 4 for 3 deal. Get stuff with bones in it like wings, legs, or thighs.
2. Enjoy savory fried chicken while seated in moving vehicle.
3. Chicken bones magically disappear via window to feed mold, ants, and crows.
Above, John warms up on the Triangle boulder.

Anorexic thwarted me yet again, although I made significant progress. This time I was able to check the foot cut at the crux, and even made it to the exciting heel over the head hook at the top. I just need a little more endurance/core, more precise foot work, more focus, and a good night's sleep. In short, I need more everything. I am convinced the insomnia is holding me back a full v-grade. Wait, that's wus-talk. V6 isn't that hard.

Anorexic attempts. from Hotel Sierra on Vimeo.

Right before leaving, we hit some moderate sport at the Pit, which is a pretty stellar little crag. I feel the limestone on the faces is of a higher quality than Charleston, and the approach is a mere 10 minute hike on an easy trail. Not too crowded either. Tried the Joker 5.12d, but couldn't put it together, especially after an entire day of bouldering. Got to the 4th or 5th bolt before throwing in the towel.


Upon arriving back in vegas, a paella dinner prepared by P awaited us. Met somebody with a unique name too: "'Rainy' ... like the weather", he said. Now that I think about it, it's a pretty cool name.

non sequitur

My friend Matt has impeccable taste in human sized rabbits. Wait, that came out wrong. My Adirondacks bouldering trip was rained out by Hurricane Danny, in a rather normal stroke for northeast summer weather (i.e. rain every weekend and sunny w/o warning during the work week when I'm trapped in deafening air conditioning and wage labor.) Going to Flagstaff tomorrow... I hope to shed the albatross of rain and send Anorexic.

Raku - P birthday

Amazing dishes, each one a visual and flavorful masterpiece. It's my favorite place in Vegas. Bouchon is amazing but I personally prefer the raku style of numerous small and varied dishes, reminiscent of spanish tapas.
This cold appetizer was ridunculous! Several of my favorite things all together: a poached egg, salmon roe (ikura), and sea urchin (uni). Ovum, sperm, gonads. Of course it's delicious. At $7 it's definitely a bargain.

Matt's woody.

Checked out Matt's woody (no, not that one)... for lack of a title/brand, I'm dubbing it "The Classroom" because you go there to... - wait for it - to get schooled. Horrible joke, but it sort of works since Matt is a teacher. A friend of his was able to drill real rock holds which provided an interesting experience. For one thing, the real rock holds were much cooler to the touch temperature-wise than the plastic holds. I don't know how it's possible but there's definitely a difference when grabbing a piece of real rock. There are close-ups of the real rock holds at his website. Maybe there's a difference because there's a liminal amount of flex and give in the plastic holds that doesn't happen with stone.
A dyno. I know it's not really climbing, but I can't help it.

Magnum area.

Sunday my old crew visited the magnum area in the gunks for some conglomerate bouldering. Warmed up on some zeros on the back side of the Magnum boulder. Above is a tallish slab. Hope those crystals don't break under the weight of your toes.

V5 Resurrection - sent. Very nice movement here with varied holds. The best part is the bump to crimp with your left toe naturally latching a toehook without you having to think about it. I know - talking about a cool move with no accompanying photo is totally rookie. Sorry about that.

V7 Poo-pah - couldn't get the go go gadget extension to the pinch. A move that Mark somehow made look easy. According to him it required a tension in the left oblique and a counterintuitive twist, and some "P90X" workouts (apparently they are good for a beach-body AND climbing Poo-pah). My mind-body could not mimic the thusly communicated concept. The V8 topout on the second ledge looks exhilirating but the talus filled landing and dearth of paddage was mildly discouraging.
Small note on the etymology of "poo-pah": I hear the individual that named this problem was hanging around some prostitutes somewhere in Queens (a perfectly respectable activity) and one of them referred to another as a "puta", which is spanish for prostitute. However, since this boulderer did not know spanish, he heard it as "Poo-pah", which must have made an impression on him since he decided to name a boulder problem after the word. Anyway, from what I saw, Resurrection and Poo-pah were the best of the area in that grade range. Although next time I want to try the overhanging boulder by Resurrection with the heinous sloping topout where all the v9 or v10s lay. There's also the arete/prow facing Resurrection ("Henry's Arete") which is apparently much harder than it looks at V8, and has been known to pop unprepped tendons. Needless to say, we left that guy alone. We concluded the day by flailing on the v5 "Old Gringo" on the front of the magnum boulder, all the while succumbing to poor technique, greasy holds and battalions of mosquitos.

Safari.

Ibex! Oryx! Siberian tigers! Giraffe!
Here I take the "Out of Africa" tour guide's recommendation and feed the giraffe with a carrot held in my mouth. The dextrous tongue still licked me though.
Back in Flagstaff for dinner, Pilar noticed that practically every establishment in town is "voted the best [fill in the blank] of Flagstaff!" But it's such a small town, there's only one of each anyway. Of course you're the best if you're the only one. Trying to get past the self-promoting best-of buzz, I found a website called http://www.hottieandthefatso.com/ (kudos for that title). They are two flagstaff locals that rate restaurants. I enjoyed their reviews, as they were straightforward and honest. At any rate, they said the best restaurant was a german restaurant called the Matterhorn. Intrigued, we went. It was excellent. How can you go wrong with a pork chop, a fried egg, and anchovies? (answer: you can't). Guess I shoulda taken the photo before chomping on the potato pancake.
The Optimator on tap was quality; it was like thomas hardy without the super thick caramel aftertaste.
Returning to the hotel with nothing to do, we drank and blew bubbles.